hahaha now keep in mind i would NEVER say it this way but i found it funny. i didn't put this in my profile in risk of one of the older people i IM would see it:

Dear Fucker....

You are my fucking friend,
And I hope you know that's fucking true.
No matter what the fuck happens,
I will stand the fuck by you.
I will fucking be there for you,
Whenever the fuck you need me,
To lend you a fuckin hand,
To do a fuckin good deed.
So just fuckin call on me,
Whenever the fuck you need anything.
Fuck... I will always be there,
Even to the bitter fuckin end.
Forward this promise to all your fuckin friends to show your fuckin friendship and watch who sends it the fuck back to you....

HAHA wooo can't get enough of it. Oh and for those of you who read this, i apply this to all of you :D